Toxic friends to ditch

12 friends every woman needs (and 3 to ditch)

You can’t get everything you need from one friend. For example, there’s the friend who you can count on to pick up your kid from daycare if you’re in a pinch and the friend who you can always count on for a martini (just don’t mix them up). I’ve complied a list of 12 friends every woman needs and three to ditch immediately below!

I’m a firm believer in women supporting other women rather than tearing each other down. I have been so lucky to find an author tribe of incredible, talented and genuine women on Instagram, which I never expected but am so grateful for.

One of those fellow writers is Emily Murray who has become a dear friend. Em doesn’t think I’m crazy for talking about my characters (check out Trevor and Brooklyn from Twist of Fate on Instagram) like they exist and she is always happy to lend an ear and offer support both personally and professionally.

She writes emotional, gritty novels that explore the intricacies of the human condition (and also have murder and mayhem). If that’s not enough, she also lives on a farm and has a white horse, just like a fairy tale. Check her out!

I featured Emily on Instagram today for woman crush Wednesday, so make sure to head over. Don’t forget to follow our hashtag #authoropwrites, turn on our post notifications, and show us some love with a like or follow.

Toxic friends to ditch

Before we get into the list of 12 friends every woman needs and three to ditch immediately, here are six book recommendations about friendship (I’m an author, remember? It’s always about books):

Check out the list below and let me know what type of friend you are in the comments!

12 friends every woman needs 

The friend to do sh*t with. You might not be super close with this girl, but she’s a ton of fun to hang out with and is always up to grab dinner and drinks after work.

The ride or die friend. If you killed someone, she would help you hide the body. Okay, maybe that’s an extreme example, but this is the person you can count on to be there for you no matter what happens.

The inspirational friend. This friend has her sh*t together, follows her dreams and is living her best life. She’s also super supportive and inspires you to be your best self too.

The “same life phase” friend. This girl might only be with you for a chapter rather than your whole book, but she plays an integral role nonetheless. Maybe you’re pregnant, getting married, writing a book, starting grad school…whatever the case might be, so is she and you bond over your shared experience for however long that lasts (and sometimes, the friendship can evolve and become long-term).

The always positive friend. This friend can always see the silver lining and brings light to even your darkest days.

The work friend. This person is your vault and helps you get through your 9-5 with laughter, coffee breaks and a keen understanding of all the key players when giving you helpful advice.

10 friends every girl needs

The give it to you straight friend. If you want to be placated, this is not the friend to ask. She is always honest and will provide constructive criticism, a dose of reality and an uncanny ability to see both sides (and call you on your bullsh*t as required).

The spontaneous friend. You’re home in your pajamas and this is the friend calling to drag you out of the house because she just heard there’s a party, or an art crawl, or something that she just needs to do right now.

The mature, reliable friend. This friend has everything figured out and is a professional at adulting. She gives the best advice and you can always count on her to guide you through difficult decisions in a tactful way.

The cheerleader friend. This friend is your biggest supporter. You’re running a marathon? She’s at the finish line waiting. You got promoted? She’s buying the champagne. When you don’t feel like you can do something, she’s there to tell you that you can because she genuinely cares and is thrilled when you’re successful.

The funny friend. When you need to laugh, this is the friend you call. She’s hilarious and tons of fun to be around even if the friendship isn’t super deep. Instead of talking through the night, you laugh.

The kindred spirit. This friend is the one you jokingly call your “wife” because you get along on every level. She instinctively understands you and feels the same way about many of the big issues in life. Essentially, she’s a joy to be around and is your perfect match (other than your husband, obviously).

10 friends everyone needs

3 friends to ditch immediately 

The frenemy. She’s nastily competitive, makes cutting, condescending comments, and is jealous of your successes while taking pleasure in your failures. She will randomly try to redeem herself so you keep her around, but she isn’t worth it. Abort, abort, abort!

The Debbie Downer friend. No matter what the situation, this friend will focus on the worst possible elements and constantly spew negativity. She’s gossipy, mean and makes your mood decrease by 85% within 5 minutes. Life is too short to spend time with people like this, so I highly recommend saying good-bye!

The wants-to-get-in-your-pants friend. In our teens and early twenties, most of us had a dude who hung around because he wanted to bang us (and maybe did, during an especially vulnerable or drunken evening). I hope most of us have gotten rid of this guy, but if you haven’t, it’s time. When your motives are getting someone naked, you’re not friends.



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6 thoughts on “12 friends every woman needs (and 3 to ditch)

  1. This post made me smile, feel grateful for my friends, and think of how I could be a better friend to others. I’ve yet to make a fairytale friend 😉 but isn’t friendship itself as magical as a fairytale? Thank you for a lovely post!

    1. Thank you so much for reading my post! I’m glad it resonated with you 🙂

      We are all chasing that fairy tale, haha!

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